you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
