Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
