how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I think your dad took our porno
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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