My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
It's Friday. Sex?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
