i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
