You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
This is my gift to your gina
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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