I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
