Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I want to make a zoo with you.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
