she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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