i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
