its not stalking. its research.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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