Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
