im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
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