im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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