That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
