hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
