They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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