I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
