thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
