That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I think I died a long time ago.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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