Don't you send me to vm
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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