At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
The best revenge is premature balding
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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