I want to walk on stilts...naked
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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