had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
