yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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