Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
