he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
