i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
We're too hungover to prance.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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