we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
