with your own penis?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
