so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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