did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
everyone is single if you try hard enough
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize