ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Randomize