some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Less talking, more tequila
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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