Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
a search helicopter?!
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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