Betty ford says i'm here all night
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Everything about him screamed your future.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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