I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
