You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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