He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Sorry my hands just texted you
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
