What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
