ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
