didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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