break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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