that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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