just come out here and I will go home with you...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
