i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
