shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
