I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize