Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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