I can't watch pbs sober anymore
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
