So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
